Eggshells 5
well the point I wanted to make was this: Churches have a culture. Their culture may be one that encourages honesty and questioning and it may be one that frowns on some questions being raised. I grew up in a family that was dysfunctional, I didn’t know it at the time. Oh, it wasn’t pleasant but it was all I knew.
Churches can be like that too. Unpleasant but all you’ve ever known.
Part of having a culture where you can be different or speak up or ask questions and not be looked at strangely has to do with being intensional about that. People have to be given permission. No that doesn’t mean you don’t believe ANYTHING. It just means that ANYONE is welcome. We will not all agree on everything. That is OK.
When the culture is healthy….you don’t have to tiptoe.
I think the hard part is when you come out of a dysfunctional culture into a healthy one, there is still a time of adjustment, even “reprogramming”, if you will. It’s hard to believe it could really be different, and living that out takes a shift in one’s own behavior as well as beliefs.
Church is important if it is a family of believers who love one another. Sometimes it is used by individuals to control others. In those cases where Jesus is more important than everything else, it becomes a loving, caring family that supports and comforts and gives life and purpose to those who make up its membership.
Ray
It would go easier for us if we sought to create a culture of Christ, rather than a culture of church, or of biblical doctrine, or of salvation through self-achieved righteousness ….
And when something is all you have ever know…sometimes you get homesick for it….even though you know it was making you sick!
Based on my own situation right now, I think it’s MUCH harder to go “back” to a dysfunctional type “closed” church from a more open, loving one. The last two fellowships I was in (for about 15 years total) were absolutely fantastic!! I mean – just fabulous.
Then we moved up here to Picayune, and . . . well – it all came tumbling down.
I’m really torn right now trying to decide what to do because for me at this stage of life and with my health no better than it is and all, I don’t know that I’ll be able to find anything better around here, you know? I mean, I’ve heard of a couple of Baptist churches that might be “better” in some ways, but then not very good in other ways that I would want, too.
So . . . Tommy . . . I know you and Kim have been able to find a healthy, vibrant church that you like very well and I’m very happy about that for you, but don’t see any way I can achieve the same thing here for myself.
So, I plug on trying to do what I CAN to make a positive difference to those other believers around me who need uplifting and encouragement. I see that (for myself at the moment) to be a worthy goal that Christ would approve of. I’m looking at this as a “mission” effort, if you will! They need to be led into enlightenment!! (I’m just kidding there, guys. Don’t get upset!)
Dee
Thanks for the series. It has given me some things to chew on.